Welcome to Cake’s 3-step guide to better sex. We will walk you through 3 important steps: getting to know yourself, communication & consent, and trying something new in the bedroom. Complete each one of these steps before moving onto the next, and be sure to note what feels particularly good, and what doesn’t.

 

The first step to having a better sex life is knowing yourself…intimately. We’ve set out 10 exercise to enhance your “me time” and spice things up a bit. Be patient with yourself, and have fun!

 

 

change positions

You’ve probably heard this before, but we’re including it because it works. Most people with penises have their “go-to” position. Switch it up from time to time—because new positions lead to new feelings.

 

 

pressure can be fun

Twisting, tugging, pressing and caressing… or all of the above! These are all great ways to experience some new sensations during self-play. Try applying pressure to different spots, like the testicles and the perineum (that spot behind your testicles).

 

 

different strokes

When we started this little endeavor called Cake, we thought we knew all the different ways to touch yourself. Turns out, you can really up your self-play repertoire.

Try different strokes, techniques, and ways of touching your penis. Be open to breaking out of the ordinary as you discover what feels good.

 

 

set the mood

This is 100% about you and your own pleasure. Recognize how important that is. Take an extra minute to adjust the lighting, get any supplies that you might want, and settle into a comfortable spot. Start to think about people and situations that turn you on. Don’t rush−embrace the moment.

 

 

trust us. thrust.

Grinding and thrusting can help increase your pleasure overall. Move your hips in a circular or back-and-forth motion, then increase the speed as you get closer to climax.

 

 

say it out loud

There’s nothing wrong with a quick and quiet session. But saying your fantasies out loud, describing what you’re doing or pretending you have a partner to talk dirty to is mighty liberating (and hot). Verbalize as you play.

 

 

under cover

You love that delicious feeling of skin-to-skin contact. But have you tried rubbing yourself through your shorts, your underwear, or even a sheet? It’s a totally different sensation.

Is this counterintuitive to what we’re selling? Most definitely. But it’s fun and it feels good, so feel free to ditch the lotion and try this simple technique.

 

 

a helping hand

Even though our lotion is meant for your time with yourself, if you happen to have a consenting partner, then by all means you can share the wealth. Our masturbation lotion, So-Low Lotion, will work well on their hands too (but only the hands—this product is not meant to be used for penetration of bodies).

 

 

edging

Want to prolong those good feelings? Incorporate the start-and-stop method into your solo session. Orgasm control, also known as “edging,” draws out the pleasure so you can have a longer, more explosive experience.

If you’re into it, start by stroking your penis until you’re about to ejaculate, then stop. Slowly, begin stroking again and increase speed until you’re almost at orgasm again, and then stop. Keep repeating this until you can’t take it anymore. The anticipation is worth it, we promise.

 

 

butt stuff

You’ve heard the rumors—and we’re here to let you know that they’re true! Stimulation inside the butt can be amazingly sexy, including when you’re alone.

The “male G spot” is the prostate, accessible with anal stimulation (also called massage). This kind of massage can increase the intensity of orgasms.

Intrigued? Start by slowly rubbing a lubricant outside and inside your anal opening with your finger. Insert your finger and massage your prostate with gentle pressure, slowly increasing your speed as the pleasure builds.