So much of the #morefunsex challenge is about communication.
And in this challenge, we’re taking communication to the next level. A level that’s hotter and wetter and designed to really turn you on. Yep, it’s dirty talk! Because as hot as talking dirty may be, lots of people don’t know how to do it (or just plain don’t feel comfortable speaking sexy words out loud). We’re here to help you with that.
Here’s why dirty talk can be a great thing to add to your routine: it’s science! Hearing words that are sexy to you can increase or enhance your excitement or arousal (and even bring you to orgasm faster!) But let’s be real—dirty talk can be one of those things that’s easier said than done…no pun intended. Talking dirty in the moment, in the midst of giving oral or being penetrated, for example, can bring up feelings of shyness, shame, and more.
So how do you solve that? Figure out what you like to hear (and say!) in bed—then practice!
The big thing here is letting your partner know how you’d like to be spoken to during sex. When we know what’s on the menu and off the menu in terms of dirty talk, we can then be creative and fun instead of overthinking.
Here’s how—this helpful tool does a lot of the work for you!
Complete the dirty-talk cheat sheet and come up with 2 - 3 phrases you want to try in the bedroom. Share these phrases with your partner ahead of time so they are not surprised. Then practice saying them aloud to each other as you fool around or have sex.
Our tips on doing the dirty (talk):
- Don’t forget to cover what DOESN’T work for you: Maybe terms like daddy or being called big, strong, etc are big nos for you. Your partner says they don’t like it when you narrate what you’re doing to their body or lots of grunting, for example. These are all valuable things to know and learn when you’re venturing into dirty talk.
- You’re allowed to change your mind: Used to be into being called baby but now it doesn’t ring your bell? Say that! It’s ok to change.
It’s ok if all this feels a little awkward at first. But in time, we bet adding some racy language into the bedroom will help both of you come—and feel more connected.