Coming Out as Demisexual: a journey with Rima Mellal

We sat down with our newest friend Rima Mellal to talk us through how sexuality is more than just a physical thing, but a spiritual journey. She walks the path of spirituality and is the owner of Wild Child Healing. During Rima’s journey of self-healing, she came across a teaching called “Cosmic Sexuality” initiated by founders Shalom Melchizedek and Victoria Leanna. Learning Cosmic Sexuality helped Rima heal her uncomfortable experiences she had experienced with sex in her past. Rima now is a Life Strategist at Wild Child Healing and also a Certified Instructor of Cosmic Sexuality.

the journey begins

One of the most exciting things about discovering who you are is identifying your sexuality. I actually never thought of this until I was asked “what does sexuality mean to you?” I had no idea, so I traced back and did a bunch of research. I realized before I got into depth of what sexuality means to me, I had to first figure out what I identify as. So, the journey began. 

As I did an extensive amount of research on all types of sexualities, I found out that I resonated with “demisexual”. It was a profound moment to find a word that describes me best. It gave me the feeling of coming home to myself.

defining demisexuality

Generally speaking, being a demisexual means that I don’t have sexual feelings for someone unless I am emotionally connected to them first. Now, after doing the research I sat with myself and all my past sexual experiences. I remember a time where I had a sexual encounter with someone who I didn’t have an emotional connection with. I felt extremely uncomfortable, a lot of resistance, I was dry, I was crying, and I had to stop. It felt like I was giving myself and getting nothing in return. The experience gave me a feeling as if someone was taking from me and leaving me empty. 

At the time I had no idea why I felt that way and questioned if there was something wrong with me. I was surrounded by people who had casual sex without an emotional connection. I remember feeling like an outsider and frequently asked myself “why couldn’t I just have casual sex?” 

Over the years I just accepted that I simply can’t have a sexual attraction towards someone I am not emotionally and energetically connected to. Basically, I needed to be deeply in love with the person to enjoy the experience.

finding cosmic sexuality

During my journey of self-healing, I came across a teaching called “Cosmic Sexuality” by Shalom Melchizedek and Victoria Leanna. Learning about Cosmic Sexuality helped me heal my uncomfortable sexual experiences I had in the past, gain my power back, deepen the connection that I strongly crave with the person I am emotionally connected with, know my worth, and most importantly deepen that connection with myself. 

Being connected emotionally is so important to me because it’s the fuel for my sexual desires. What helps me spark my sexual attraction is having the right conversations, getting to know one another beyond the physical, strengthen that connection, building a deep emotional bond, and most importantly feeling the magic that comes with this connection. Now, I own my sexuality because I did the necessary work to discover it and heal it. And along the way I found some really amazing people and “Cosmic Sexuality”. 

It’s our soul birth-right to find our authentic higher selves and be your authentic self even if it doesn’t make sense to others. I assure you, you will always find your way back home.

By: Rima Mellal

Owner of Wild Child Healing

Life Strategist & Certified Instructor of Cosmic Sexuality

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